Sunday, November 15, 2009

Ive lost my voice trying to be heard over this noise.

Thinking about how much everything is/has changed, is still overwhelming. Today I met a friends grandmother, who had only seen me in a photo and heard the kind things Brittany has said about me, and she was so sweet and loving, After one hug and greeting I realized how much that woman reminded me of my Grandmother, that brought peace to my heart, because it has been a year since Ive been in the presence of my grandmother, I got a little emotional on the way home. I miss that woman very much, and I can't help but feel, that if Leukemia had not ended her life, she would still be going strong, cooking, sewing and teaching me the meaning of unconditional love.

I like to think I'm doing my best at life, but after a conversation with my cousin I'm doubting myself, it only took one question, what happened to all your close friends, what changed? my response...... Monique died.

constantly I find my self wondering what I should do more of, I always feel like I'm coming up short.

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