I guess I forgot to keep my friends from falling off.

Here I am, alone and lonely.

don't get me wrong, I know I have a handful of friends, that will always be here for me, but I'm not doing my part anymore,maybe if I had a steady job I could go see Alicia and spend time with her, maybe if I wasn't so broke I could afford to actually treat Leigh to dinner for once. Maybe If I would have listened to Monique more and actually called my friends, I would be getting ready to go do something on this Friday night instead of sitting her filling this box with words, because I'm lonely.

If there is one thing I have succeeded at since Mo's passing, it is to successfully push people out of my life, So many have tried, people who didn't really know me, but wanted to, to try, to be a friend to me, But I decided to take the easy was out, and just push and push......... I guess I never really considered the end result.

maybe I should have.