where is your sister at?

That one question was my slap in the face last night.

I was doing so good at just existing last night while I bar hopped with Niya, and then I ran into somebody from high school who obviously had no idea Monique is....dead.(wow that is never gonna be easy to say or type)I started crying, and of coarse we left the bar. well we ended up at java and I started crying again and ran to the bathroom, looked in the mirror, and told myself to get it together and then asked Niya to get me shitfaced.

I faintly remember the rest of the night, I know I fell off my stool and had to be walked out of the bar, fell out of Niya's car and puked everywhere.

I was beyond drunk, all just to numb my pain.

I can't keep this up much longer.